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Tapestry 

End of Life Doula & Educator

In the gentle and quiet words of Ram Dass

"We are all walking each other home"

An invitation to enter 'Sacred Space'.......an honour.....a humbling journey during an extraordinarily intimate time

Often the most difficult moment is beginning the conversation..opening Pandora's Box! You may have heard there are 3 topics that you avoid at any social gathering: politics, religion and money….in my experience the topic that prompts an immediate visceral withdrawal and avoidance of any eye contact is...... Death.

As an End of Life Death Doula ~ the vision is allowing and prompting the conversation to begin and encouraging honest and heartfelt feelings to unravel. To provide compassionate guidance and non-medical support to those who are are facing the end of their life, while being mindful of their loved ones. There are many decisions that the individual can make that may align with their life choices and wishes. This will create the most comforting journey through all phases of their transition; before, during and after. I feel the best way to begin is to 'Meet someone where they are".

Meeting someone where they are means putting aside our wants for them, whether those wants are in service to them or not, and endeavoring to understand where

they are in their journey. It begins by listening without judgment, asking

questions openly and honestly, and above all being mindful of their journey.

In Yoga there is a Sanskrit word that describes my intention as an

End of Life Doula:  Drishti commonly translates to a 'single point of focus'. My 'Drishti' is on the individual and their circle. My path is to listen and offer the most effective comforting tools to the person on their end of life journey. Outlined below are various offerings that I can provide.....

An Advance Care Plan will help reduce any fear or anxiety that may be experienced by the individual and family and discussing choices that may be in their control. We can work on and facilitate an Advance Care Plan so those involved are aware of the decisions that have been made and the individual will be comforted knowing that their wishes are being heard and honoured.

 

The challenging questions can be asked such as where the individual may

want to die if there is a choice offered, the atmosphere they wish created and interactions that they want or don't want with others, including family and friends. Do they envision a Celebration of their Life in the garden at their family home? Perhaps a Living Funeral so they are able to exchange all of the love

notes that need to be shared? These pieces of the puzzle will ensure all involved are aware of the closer to and after death choices that the individual has

made, and will lessen the burden for all. The intention is to make it so the individual and loved ones have more time to be in a loving, fear-free and safe space. 

Legacy Projects can be cathartic and healing for the individual and unfold in many ways. Remembering the beautiful moments of one's life will always produce a smile or a gentle nod.....these moments can be documented in letters, a family journal, cards or on a paper napkin that is close at hand for that special remembrance.

Spiritual, sensory and emotional support such as Reiki, Aromatherapy, Guided Meditation, Reading, Visualization Techniques, Crystal and Energy work, based on the person's beliefs, comfort level and wishes.  

 

Vigilling ~ An end of life vigil is the act of offering compassionate companionship and peaceful support for the individual and their loved ones through active dying in the days​ or hours prior to their final journey. 

Celebration of Life, Home Funeral, Funeral Service, Memorials or Graveside Services

As a Funeral Celebrant I would be honoured to discuss all options available for this sacred time. The Ceremony will be crafted for the individual, taking into

consideration the thoughts and wishes that may have been voiced during any Advanced Care Planning.

 

Ceremony and Ritual during this time may provide space for emotional and spiritual healing for those who have shared love with the person who is being honoured.

As an End of Life Doula I refrain from offering medical or legal advice. All decisions are for the individual or representative to make. My role is to offer a safe space for conversation, information, listening and guidance to ensure all wishes and options unfold in a manner that provides ease. The journey is a collaborative team effort and confidentiality is guaranteed. 

 

 

 

I invite you to enjoy this beautiful interlude by Richard Garvey

When your feet are tired
from a long day dear
I will meet you where you are
if your heart gets heavy
because it holds a lot
I will meet you where you are
Long days will come and go
long nights will be all we know
we are all made
to be loved and known
but we all long to be seen
and let show
When your eyes meet mine
I won't miss a blink
I will meet you where you are
when your tears fall
I won't turn away
I will meet you where you are
So don't hide your face
when you speak to me
oh I believe you
want to hear what you need
when darkness comes
to take you there
I will meet you where you are
I will meet you where you are
And the suns gonna shine
down on your face
I will meet you where you are
And the rainbows will dance
all across your skies
I will meet you where you are

 

 

  

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